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Ask a Doc – Full-time Caregiving with Suellywn Stewart, M.D.

Question: My elderly mother is becoming frail and can no longer care for herself.  What should I know about full-time caregiving before I decide whether to accept the responsibility?

Answer: As life expectancy in the U.S. continues to rise, providing care for one’s parents is increasingly common.  According to a June 2015 study by the National Alliance for Caregiving and the AARP Public Policy Institute, nearly 35 million Americans have served as a caregiver to someone age 50 or older within the past year.  While caregiving can be an incredibly rewarding experience, it is often challenging and may not be the best fit for every individual. 

First, it is important to understand the responsibilities associated with full-time caregiving, and to be honest with yourself regarding your availability, stamina and abilities.  Family caregivers spend an average of about 24 hours per week assisting with a variety of tasks including getting in and out of bed, getting dressed, bathing/showering, meal preparation and feeding, transportation, housework, grocery shopping, managing finances, administering medications or injections, and coordinating medical appointments.

Many caregivers lack information on caregiving topics, and some even provide medical assistance despite having no prior preparation or training.  Talk with your mother and her physician in order to ensure that you fully understand her needs.  If she requires certain medical procedures at home, have her nurse or physician demonstrate the process until you are comfortable with the various techniques.  For some, extensive medical needs may require the professional assistance found in an assisted living community or nursing home.  Take time to research the various senior housing options in your area so that you and your mother understand the alternatives that are available to you.

Caregiving can take a physical and emotional toll, and your own health is essential to your ability to care for your mother.  Nearly one-quarter of caregivers report that their own health has deteriorated while caring for their loved one, while about two-thirds find their caregiving role to be moderately or highly stressful.  Support from friends, neighbors, siblings, and other family members is often vital in reducing stress and facilitating personal wellness among caregivers.  The ability to accept help and take breaks as needed is critical to avoiding burnout.  

It is important to communicate with your family regarding your decision to become a full-time caregiver.  Schedule a time to discuss your plans, and ensure that your mother is included in 
an ongoing conversation regarding her needs and preferences.  You also may wish to join a caregivers’ support group and attend several meetings before making a final decision.  

Additionally, understanding your mother’s financial situation, as well as your own, is important in making caregiving decisions.  Providing care for your mother may require you to spend more money than you typically would, and your income may decline due to time spent away from work.  You may wish to meet with a financial planner and/or an attorney to determine the feasibility of full-time caregiving, and discuss a living will, power of attorney, and any other financial or legal concerns.

Despite the challenges, providing care for one’s parent can be incredibly rewarding.  Your personal role in your mother’s health may help to ease your concerns regarding her safety and well-being.  Many individuals also find that their relationship with their parent is strengthened as a result of caregiving.  In addition, depending on your mother’s needs, becoming a full-time caregiver may be the best option financially.  Finally, your ongoing companionship can have a significant and positive impact on your mother’s quality of life. 

Taking on the role of caregiver may allow your mother to remain fairly self-sufficient for as long as possible.  While it is a challenging and demanding role, many find it to be very emotionally rewarding.  Understanding your responsibilities and keeping the lines of communication open will help to ensure that the process goes as smoothly as possible.

| Posted On : 10/30/2015 9:59:18 AM Filed under: